


full stop.

by skkaie29



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Death, Kim Jongin | Kai-centric, M/M, Songfic, Suicide, angst angst and angst, doesn't make sense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-24
Updated: 2020-10-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:20:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27178462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skkaie29/pseuds/skkaie29
Summary: based off Jeremy Zucker's "full stop".jongin decided to end it with a full stop, and not a semicolon.(sehun and jongin break up and there's a hell load of angst and confusing shit, jongin goes insane basically)
Relationships: Kim Jongin | Kai/Oh Sehun
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	full stop.

You'll never see me to the core

All the ways I've been before

You'll learn to see there's so much more to this

_ when sehun walked out the door, all jongin could do was watch, as the love of his life just… left. _

_ jongin didn’t know how to feel.  _

_ everything was a misunderstanding, why didn’t he have the urge to… to explain himself? _

_ why did jongin not feel anything? _

_ Can't you see I'm here all alone? _

_ Can't you see I'm far from home? _

_ Even when I'm dreamin' the most _

_ I keep my deepest fears too close _

_ 2 weeks since sehun walked out. _

_ 2 weeks since jongin didn’t feel anything. _

_ he sat in the empty bed, emotionless, hugging his knees. _

_ the only form of emotion he felt was longing, longing for the one person who probably hated him the most. _

And I should know by now

It's better if I calm down

It's better if I lash out

Instead of clinging on to

_ then, as if a switch flipped, _

_ all the memories of them washed away, as if it was all going down the drain. _

_ but jongin caught them. he tried his best to take as much as he could. _

_ but why was he clinging on? it was all over. _

I wanna be with someone

I wanna feel somethin'

Instead of holdin' onto

Holdin' onto nothin' (holdin' onto me)

_ jongin stared at the empty side of the bed. _

_ no sehun. _

_ as much as he hated it, he just wished someone would come over, hug him, tell him it’s all okay, that sehun would come back. _

_ he wanted that someone to be sehun. _

_ he could dream on. _

I can't believe we're so similar

Waitin' for the leaves to change

Wishin' I could be

Prayin' I could be the same

_ 4 months since the incident. _

_ he heard from some mutual friends that sehun had kind of become a social recluse, just like jongin himself. _

_ did it affect sehun as much as it affected jongin? _

_ did sehun feel how jongin felt? _

_ how jongin… didn’t feel at all? _

_ no, that’s not it. _

_ if sehun really felt how jongin was feeling, he wouldn’t walk out like that. _

_ no, jongin didn’t mean anything to sehun. _

Science can't explain the divine

I swear I get let down most times

Plato couldn't keep love in lines

So I keep trying, and trying, and trying

But I'm not done

_ as jongin stared out his window, up at the sunset, it seemed prettier than before. _

_ as if… it were calling out to him.  _

_ sehun… he would want this, wouldn’t he? _

_ wouldn’t he want to see jongin suffer, like he had been for the past 4 months? _

_ sehun knew exactly what he was doing to jongin, jongin knew it. _

_ step by step, he walked up the stairs to the rooftop of his apartment complex. _

Will the solace in art fill the hole in my heart?

Well, inside, I'm growing tired of conversations, ah

If I had a soul that was painted in gold

Then I'd keep draggin' it down in the dirt until I'm not wrong

_ there, on the rooftop, jongin lost it. _

_ as if, the switch flipped again, and now all his emotions were pouring out. _

_ all the pent up emotions from the past 4 months. _

_ jongin screamed. jongin cried.  _

_ why, sehun, why? _

_ why did you assume i was cheating on you, jumping so quick to assumptions like that? _

_ you never change, do you? _

_ this is what i get for trying to plan an anniversary party for you? to get fucking dumped and losing my sanity? _

_ god, i hope you know what you do to me. _

So assume

We could both lie in the setting sun

I'll be on my way before we're done

_ there, jongin spread out his arms, like wings. _

_ jongin screamed. jongin cried. jongin died. _

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> hi :D don’t ask me what this angsty piece of shit is, it’s 1am pls give me a break
> 
> jeremy’s songs are so nice to make stories out of, and since i’m a sucker for songfics, i got the idea while listening to love is not dying
> 
> expect more from that album, and expect it to be just as angsty ;)
> 
> well, peace out


End file.
